A Piece of Heaven
"Don’t be afraid to show your feelings."
I will never forget his words. They went straight into my mind and heart. I thought I will never hear those words from anyone. He’s so understanding and loving that he encourages me to come out from my shell…to become who I really am, to express myself. I’m always afraid of so many things. I worry too much. I cannot be myself when I’m in front of people. It’s as if anytime, they will hurt me. I’m vulnerable. I’m weak. I’m irresolute. And most of the time, I don’t want to show that. That’s why I’m trying to look strong. But when I’m alone, I cry. I become depress. I’m falling deep deep down to that black crevice of loneliness. Somehow I find it a refuge, and after that I will emerge from it again. Relieved but still gloomy within.
His love can save me..it saves me. When I think of him, I realize that I’m not alone as I really think. That I have someone I can count on. But how could someone so good like him can love someone so miserable like me? I wish I can bring myself to understand the answers. I have never been loved this way before. No one has really love me like the way he does. But I do not even know if I deserve his love…his pure and unconditional love. He always tells me how amazing I am..that I’m a person who is easy to love and deserves to be loved. I wish I can really believe that. I believe in him but it’s hard to believe in my self.
Maybe I’m just a difficult person..somehow, I can feel it. It’s as if ever since, I’m already restless..tormented..full of conflicts. I do not even know what I want. I have so many choices but I’m afraid to choose. I have the strength of will and perhaps the ability, but I lack the courage. There is a certain sadness, a longing for something incorporeal..for something good. Always searching for something and is not satisfied with the superficial… Finding solace in God in times of difficulties and uncertainties, and in the hope that after suffering, there is comfort…
And the love.. And in the love of one person who is so dear to me..
Him. It’s not everyday that one gets to meet someone as wonderful as him. Almost perfect..transparent..free from hatred and anger..always cheerful and full of love. To him, life is not a game. It’s not for the pursuit of frivolous things.. Life is full of responsibilities, and when it comes to responsibilties, he’s the best that I know. That’s why I consider myself lucky for meeting such a person. But what did I do to deserve such luck?
We may be poles apart. We have so many differences. But instead of causing difficulties, our differences greatly help us. True, sometimes love is not enough to bridge the differences in people, but it is this desire to balance our differences with our similarities that make us understand, value and love each other more. It is him who teaches me to believe in myself, to manifest myself, and to love myself. And it is also him who lightens up that dark side of me. He’s more than anyone or anything in this world. He’s a gift from above that I will always be thankful for.
I will never forget his words. They went straight into my mind and heart. I thought I will never hear those words from anyone. He’s so understanding and loving that he encourages me to come out from my shell…to become who I really am, to express myself. I’m always afraid of so many things. I worry too much. I cannot be myself when I’m in front of people. It’s as if anytime, they will hurt me. I’m vulnerable. I’m weak. I’m irresolute. And most of the time, I don’t want to show that. That’s why I’m trying to look strong. But when I’m alone, I cry. I become depress. I’m falling deep deep down to that black crevice of loneliness. Somehow I find it a refuge, and after that I will emerge from it again. Relieved but still gloomy within.
His love can save me..it saves me. When I think of him, I realize that I’m not alone as I really think. That I have someone I can count on. But how could someone so good like him can love someone so miserable like me? I wish I can bring myself to understand the answers. I have never been loved this way before. No one has really love me like the way he does. But I do not even know if I deserve his love…his pure and unconditional love. He always tells me how amazing I am..that I’m a person who is easy to love and deserves to be loved. I wish I can really believe that. I believe in him but it’s hard to believe in my self.
Maybe I’m just a difficult person..somehow, I can feel it. It’s as if ever since, I’m already restless..tormented..full of conflicts. I do not even know what I want. I have so many choices but I’m afraid to choose. I have the strength of will and perhaps the ability, but I lack the courage. There is a certain sadness, a longing for something incorporeal..for something good. Always searching for something and is not satisfied with the superficial… Finding solace in God in times of difficulties and uncertainties, and in the hope that after suffering, there is comfort…
And the love.. And in the love of one person who is so dear to me..
Him. It’s not everyday that one gets to meet someone as wonderful as him. Almost perfect..transparent..free from hatred and anger..always cheerful and full of love. To him, life is not a game. It’s not for the pursuit of frivolous things.. Life is full of responsibilities, and when it comes to responsibilties, he’s the best that I know. That’s why I consider myself lucky for meeting such a person. But what did I do to deserve such luck?
We may be poles apart. We have so many differences. But instead of causing difficulties, our differences greatly help us. True, sometimes love is not enough to bridge the differences in people, but it is this desire to balance our differences with our similarities that make us understand, value and love each other more. It is him who teaches me to believe in myself, to manifest myself, and to love myself. And it is also him who lightens up that dark side of me. He’s more than anyone or anything in this world. He’s a gift from above that I will always be thankful for.
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